You lay dreaming in a beautiful slumber
The next room may as well be half a world away
Soft snores and twitches in your eye betray
The story behind your eyes
None will ever know
And it is in this mystery that I remember you
The soft blue of your eyes that look so full of love
The shape of your mouth as you speak
Leaving me hanging by the thread of your next word
A smile that is so much like a hug I want to wrap myself up in it
I remember your love
The way you can make every day seem not so bleak.
So, here we stand
In the middle of the future we used to dream about
Nothing like we planned
Yet everything we knew would happen
And I've run out of words
Because the feelings became so huge
And I will love you.
And I will want you.
And I will feel you.
And I will feel for you.
Until you wake up
Rested and ready to live our dream
Available for purchase! |
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Showing posts with label verses. Show all posts
Showing posts with label verses. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 27, 2016
Friday, June 17, 2016
By Any Other Name
Question the beauty of a rose
For a love that may go by any other name
May be replaced in the dark of night
Where dreams rule over fate and
Roses may make a man bleed
Question the beauty of a rose
For a love whose growth must be pruned
Groomed and taught to be pleasant
Lest its thorns become wild and
A man becomes enslaved to an ideal of "beautiful"
Question the beauty of a rose
For a love that smells so sweet
May find its way into the heart
Where love's battle with sensible rages ever on and
Roses may make a man headsick
Welcome the beauty of the dandelion
For a love that is so pure
It is first seen by children
As a gift presented to their mother and
An innocence that once lost may never be recaptured
Welcome the beauty of the dandelion
For a love so sweet it may become wine
Sharing this honeyed intoxication so
It may be forgiven for growing so wild and
Beautifully, unapologetically free
For a love that may go by any other name
May be replaced in the dark of night
Where dreams rule over fate and
Roses may make a man bleed
Question the beauty of a rose
For a love whose growth must be pruned
Groomed and taught to be pleasant
Lest its thorns become wild and
A man becomes enslaved to an ideal of "beautiful"
Question the beauty of a rose
For a love that smells so sweet
May find its way into the heart
Where love's battle with sensible rages ever on and
Roses may make a man headsick
Welcome the beauty of the dandelion
For a love that is so pure
It is first seen by children
As a gift presented to their mother and
An innocence that once lost may never be recaptured
Welcome the beauty of the dandelion
For a love so sweet it may become wine
Sharing this honeyed intoxication so
It may be forgiven for growing so wild and
Beautifully, unapologetically free
Thursday, May 19, 2016
Sketchbook
It started with a line
A pencil sketch from a steady hand
Vertical and straight, right down the left margin
Until a sudden curve
Quite literally draws it away
Mere seconds before it would have run out of page
and died a smudge on the desk
The curve became a spiral
A slow and determined movement
Building a path
Traveling around and around itself
As if it were seeking its own center
Seeking some sort literal closure
in the absence of an emotional one.
It started again with a square
One on top of another
Connected at the corners building a cube
Shaded on the side and
Casting a shadow to block out the spiral
A box to keep everything in
and the walls to keep everything out
Because this picture isn't worth 1,000 words
It's only a sketch worth 500
Just a moment in time, a second really
To explore the white space and
Rob it of its purity
Spreading darkness like butter onto bread
feeding consciousness with beauty only to be thrown away
In the end maybe its enough
It might just happen that this sketch reached its full potential
And died happy in the trash
Balled up in the corner, hugging itself
Finally loving itself and being happy to do it
Or maybe that's the lie
and every sketch that ever died in the trash is mad as hell
It could have been so much more
The next Mona Lisa or
Something as bright as Starry Night
Cathartic as the Scream
Only how will a sketch ever know
Huddled up around itself in the trash
the junkie of art
Then it starts again with a line
Only the hand isn't so steady now
It shakes, trembling with urgent desire
An artist's need to create
To get that next fix
An explosion of self-expression in an image
saying everything that must never be said
This line is darker
Striking in its boldness
Running to the edge of the white
Daring itself to jump from the page
To the sky as a bird in flight
A masterpiece sculpted from the meager beginnings
of bold lines on a page
Instead the jump is a break
A right angle across and another up
Sketching the path of an elevator
Down to up and down again
Then back up and down more quickly
Cycling faster and faster rushing to the right margin
where it will die, a smudge on the desk
It started with a line
A brushstroke from a steady hand
Vertical and straight, right down the left side of the canvas
Until a sudden curve
Quite literally paints it away
The beginning of a new picture born from trash
a masterpiece worth 1,000 words.
A pencil sketch from a steady hand
Vertical and straight, right down the left margin
Until a sudden curve
Quite literally draws it away
Mere seconds before it would have run out of page
and died a smudge on the desk
The curve became a spiral
A slow and determined movement
Building a path
Traveling around and around itself
As if it were seeking its own center
Seeking some sort literal closure
in the absence of an emotional one.
It started again with a square
One on top of another
Connected at the corners building a cube
Shaded on the side and
Casting a shadow to block out the spiral
A box to keep everything in
and the walls to keep everything out
Because this picture isn't worth 1,000 words
It's only a sketch worth 500
Just a moment in time, a second really
To explore the white space and
Rob it of its purity
Spreading darkness like butter onto bread
feeding consciousness with beauty only to be thrown away
In the end maybe its enough
It might just happen that this sketch reached its full potential
And died happy in the trash
Balled up in the corner, hugging itself
Finally loving itself and being happy to do it
Or maybe that's the lie
and every sketch that ever died in the trash is mad as hell
It could have been so much more
The next Mona Lisa or
Something as bright as Starry Night
Cathartic as the Scream
Only how will a sketch ever know
Huddled up around itself in the trash
the junkie of art
Then it starts again with a line
Only the hand isn't so steady now
It shakes, trembling with urgent desire
An artist's need to create
To get that next fix
An explosion of self-expression in an image
saying everything that must never be said
This line is darker
Striking in its boldness
Running to the edge of the white
Daring itself to jump from the page
To the sky as a bird in flight
A masterpiece sculpted from the meager beginnings
of bold lines on a page
Instead the jump is a break
A right angle across and another up
Sketching the path of an elevator
Down to up and down again
Then back up and down more quickly
Cycling faster and faster rushing to the right margin
where it will die, a smudge on the desk
It started with a line
A brushstroke from a steady hand
Vertical and straight, right down the left side of the canvas
Until a sudden curve
Quite literally paints it away
The beginning of a new picture born from trash
a masterpiece worth 1,000 words.
Saturday, May 14, 2016
The Minotaur and the Satyr
Did I ever tell you about the time I caught the Sun?
See, where I grew up; it was dark all the time. Cold, and really, really hard to make your way without constantly tripping yourself up and falling face first into some shit. But everyday, there was the Sun. So high up and somehow still so bright. And my Gods the warmth! It was like being wrapped inside joy; as if love was something tangible that you could touch and wrap around yourself like a blanket that would never get cold.
I looked at the Sun everyday. I admired it. "One day," I told myself, "One day, I'm going to catch it and I'll never be cold or in the darkness ever again!" It was such a higher power to me. Everything it represented was everything I felt inside about myself. I knew that I belonged with the Sun; that I had somehow been born wrong and the darkness that was supposed to feel like home felt alien next to even the idea of the Sun.
The day that I caught the sun was the happiest day of my life. For the first time I felt complete. I felt whole next to a love that matched my own. I felt every drop of its light as a kiss on my thirsty lips. My soul was sated in its arms and I felt safe away from the darkness that had been my home for so long.
And I clung to this love so tightly that, through the light, I didn't see the darkness that still surrounded me. I held the Sun to my breast as a greedy miser; desperate to escape the cold, loneliness of the past. I burned myself in its heat and I blinded myself with its light until I could no longer see anything but memories of days gone by.
What did the Sun do? That day I learned that the Sun's light is for everyone. That the darkness follows us all. The Sun is so bright that it can see the beauty that I couldn't. The Sun is so warm that it turns the barren wasteland of the coldest heart into all of the love in the world when flowers bloom and trees blow in the breeze. The Sun is so much more than the love of a good man that was born into darkness.
So I let the Sun go.
And the Sun, it did set that night, it's parting gift to me the return of my sight and healing of my burns. With eyes that looked upon the World anew I watched it go. Our time together must have taken its toll on the Sun as well because as it sank to sleep it seemed bruised; purple and red and blue as if it too had been battered by my greed. I whispered an oath of my undying love and devotion to the wind in the hopes the message would be carried on the horizon to the Sun's ears. Then I turned and I returned to the darkness that had been my home; after all, you don't expect a sunset to admire you back.
But that isn't the end.
No sooner had I turned my head than I saw a something emerge from the dark. Beautifully tanned skin covered rippling muscles from torso to head where two massive horns curved backward in a spiral. Soft, brown fur covered the legs of a mighty beast that seemed ready to pounce at a moment's notice. A lopsided grin twisted his mouth and melted my heart as this beautiful Satyr let out a bellow of laughter.
"Beautiful man," he laughed, "Where do you think the Sun goes at night?" And he wrapped me in his arms and I felt complete. I felt whole next to a love that matched my own. I felt every drop of his light pass through me as our lips met in a kiss dominated by passion. My soul was sated. "You only need let go, because even the Sun needs a break from the darkness."
"Will you stay?" I asked.
"Not forever." said the Satyr, "But for a time. For a time. And then the Sun will have to rise again."
"What will I do then?" I asked fearfully.
"Always remember that the sunset does admire you back." he answered.
See, where I grew up; it was dark all the time. Cold, and really, really hard to make your way without constantly tripping yourself up and falling face first into some shit. But everyday, there was the Sun. So high up and somehow still so bright. And my Gods the warmth! It was like being wrapped inside joy; as if love was something tangible that you could touch and wrap around yourself like a blanket that would never get cold.
I looked at the Sun everyday. I admired it. "One day," I told myself, "One day, I'm going to catch it and I'll never be cold or in the darkness ever again!" It was such a higher power to me. Everything it represented was everything I felt inside about myself. I knew that I belonged with the Sun; that I had somehow been born wrong and the darkness that was supposed to feel like home felt alien next to even the idea of the Sun.
The day that I caught the sun was the happiest day of my life. For the first time I felt complete. I felt whole next to a love that matched my own. I felt every drop of its light as a kiss on my thirsty lips. My soul was sated in its arms and I felt safe away from the darkness that had been my home for so long.
And I clung to this love so tightly that, through the light, I didn't see the darkness that still surrounded me. I held the Sun to my breast as a greedy miser; desperate to escape the cold, loneliness of the past. I burned myself in its heat and I blinded myself with its light until I could no longer see anything but memories of days gone by.
What did the Sun do? That day I learned that the Sun's light is for everyone. That the darkness follows us all. The Sun is so bright that it can see the beauty that I couldn't. The Sun is so warm that it turns the barren wasteland of the coldest heart into all of the love in the world when flowers bloom and trees blow in the breeze. The Sun is so much more than the love of a good man that was born into darkness.
So I let the Sun go.
And the Sun, it did set that night, it's parting gift to me the return of my sight and healing of my burns. With eyes that looked upon the World anew I watched it go. Our time together must have taken its toll on the Sun as well because as it sank to sleep it seemed bruised; purple and red and blue as if it too had been battered by my greed. I whispered an oath of my undying love and devotion to the wind in the hopes the message would be carried on the horizon to the Sun's ears. Then I turned and I returned to the darkness that had been my home; after all, you don't expect a sunset to admire you back.
But that isn't the end.
No sooner had I turned my head than I saw a something emerge from the dark. Beautifully tanned skin covered rippling muscles from torso to head where two massive horns curved backward in a spiral. Soft, brown fur covered the legs of a mighty beast that seemed ready to pounce at a moment's notice. A lopsided grin twisted his mouth and melted my heart as this beautiful Satyr let out a bellow of laughter.
"Beautiful man," he laughed, "Where do you think the Sun goes at night?" And he wrapped me in his arms and I felt complete. I felt whole next to a love that matched my own. I felt every drop of his light pass through me as our lips met in a kiss dominated by passion. My soul was sated. "You only need let go, because even the Sun needs a break from the darkness."
"Will you stay?" I asked.
"Not forever." said the Satyr, "But for a time. For a time. And then the Sun will have to rise again."
"What will I do then?" I asked fearfully.
"Always remember that the sunset does admire you back." he answered.
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
How to Operate With a Broken Heart
I'm trying to find the words
Or a way to explain what's in my heart
All the feels piled on top of me
Pinned under their weight, I couldn't breathe
Until this crack in my chest opened to a chasm
And I stood up feeling numb.
The real fuck of it is
The world looks the same and nothing's changed
Just a slight tint from my eyes that makes everything look just a little blue
So I just put one foot in front of the other with a smile
Walking through an unchanged world that doesn't give a damn
Inside I'll ask "what about me?" and "what about my plans?"
Then I'll choke back that sob and keep walking
Keep smiling
Because nothing's changed.
It's the end of the road
And I still got bills to pay
I still got to eat and sleep and work and dream
With this mask upon my face
Stepping one foot in front of the other with a smile
Passing all the faces that taught me what it is to sonder
Don't you know this hurt?
Can't you feel this pain?
Fuck no they don't care
Why would they give one fuck when
I can't wake up in the morning feeling happy or
How I cry myself to sleep every night because the nightmares just won't stop and
There's fear bleeding out from under the bed and coming out of every closet
And I'm trying to find the words
A way to explain what's in my heart
Just to show you, to show me, to show everything
I got ulcers in my belly all from worry
My back is out and I can't stand up carrying all this weight
It hurts here in my chest
All the way to my soul
Drowning in a river of tears that only flows inside until everything is just a little blue
Because nothing's changed
And the world still don't give a damn
So the mask smiles when I can't
And I'll walk through day after day
Until I stand up and feel numb
Because the real fuck of it is
The right words only matter when there's someone to listen
Or a way to explain what's in my heart
All the feels piled on top of me
Pinned under their weight, I couldn't breathe
Until this crack in my chest opened to a chasm
And I stood up feeling numb.
The real fuck of it is
The world looks the same and nothing's changed
Just a slight tint from my eyes that makes everything look just a little blue
So I just put one foot in front of the other with a smile
Walking through an unchanged world that doesn't give a damn
Inside I'll ask "what about me?" and "what about my plans?"
Then I'll choke back that sob and keep walking
Keep smiling
Because nothing's changed.
It's the end of the road
And I still got bills to pay
I still got to eat and sleep and work and dream
With this mask upon my face
Stepping one foot in front of the other with a smile
Passing all the faces that taught me what it is to sonder
Don't you know this hurt?
Can't you feel this pain?
Fuck no they don't care
Why would they give one fuck when
I can't wake up in the morning feeling happy or
How I cry myself to sleep every night because the nightmares just won't stop and
There's fear bleeding out from under the bed and coming out of every closet
And I'm trying to find the words
A way to explain what's in my heart
Just to show you, to show me, to show everything
I got ulcers in my belly all from worry
My back is out and I can't stand up carrying all this weight
It hurts here in my chest
All the way to my soul
Drowning in a river of tears that only flows inside until everything is just a little blue
Because nothing's changed
And the world still don't give a damn
So the mask smiles when I can't
And I'll walk through day after day
Until I stand up and feel numb
Because the real fuck of it is
The right words only matter when there's someone to listen
Thursday, April 28, 2016
Time Squared
The day you were born
The day we met
My future became our future
I smiled more than ever
Because I knew I’d never be alone
I’ve watched you grow
With fascination, admiration and adulation
All I want
Is to see your future
To honor your wish
In seeing love unfettered, held only for you
I’ve learned
Through your teachings
With time
All things will change
Friday, April 22, 2016
Mirror, Mirror
Mirror, mirror
Tell me a tale
Not of the fairest
Nor of the beast
Weave the tale of what you see
When I gaze into the window of your soul
Mirror, mirror
On the wall
Is it me that hangs on ev'ry word
Perhaps it's you
Speaking the truth
So bold it can't be understood
Mirror, mirror
Shall I look closely
To see the ugliness inside
Cold hard honesty
Reflected in your deadpan smile
Sending shivers down my spine
Mirror, mirror
What do you see
The image of a man
Plus the reflection of what's behind him
Do I look at what you see
Or what's in sight beyond
Mirror, mirror
What do I see
A reflection of pain
Soothed with platitude and rhyme
Rising to the surface and above
A scar that never heals
Mirror, mirror
On the wall
What is true
Comes from those who call
And who is fairest
Are the healers known only as 'friend'
Tell me a tale
Not of the fairest
Nor of the beast
Weave the tale of what you see
When I gaze into the window of your soul
Mirror, mirror
On the wall
Is it me that hangs on ev'ry word
Perhaps it's you
Speaking the truth
So bold it can't be understood
Mirror, mirror
Shall I look closely
To see the ugliness inside
Cold hard honesty
Reflected in your deadpan smile
Sending shivers down my spine
Mirror, mirror
What do you see
The image of a man
Plus the reflection of what's behind him
Do I look at what you see
Or what's in sight beyond
Mirror, mirror
What do I see
A reflection of pain
Soothed with platitude and rhyme
Rising to the surface and above
A scar that never heals
Mirror, mirror
On the wall
What is true
Comes from those who call
And who is fairest
Are the healers known only as 'friend'
Tuesday, March 1, 2016
I Only Cry When I'm Alone
In the morning
When the sun shines brightly and
I can see the beauty in the world
As the leaves whisper on the wind that
Everything is fine
I swallow a pill to make myself believe, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In my heart
Where love grows in transilience
I'm surrounded by the acceptance and fellowship and
I belong in this world full of devotion and care
Yet I still feel like a migrant,
Oliver Twist holding out his empty bowl, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In the evening
When the sun kisses the moon goodnight
As it sinks into the darkness to rise once more
Painting the sky with pastel luminescence so breathtaking
The Gods themselves stop to take heed and
I shiver in the cold and lonely darkness I've created, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In my mind
Where I remember every good thing I've ever missed and
I try desperately to forget every wrong turn I've ever made
Wars are fought against my heart and
Casualties are made of everything and everyone I love
Yet when the trumpets sound the ceasefire, it's too late, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In the dark of night
When your eyes can still find mine but
I can't see your face
Only the wound I've made on your heart
Bruised and bleeding
Choked in the desperation of my amity until
I wish I could only cry when I'm alone
When the sun shines brightly and
I can see the beauty in the world
As the leaves whisper on the wind that
Everything is fine
I swallow a pill to make myself believe, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In my heart
Where love grows in transilience
I'm surrounded by the acceptance and fellowship and
I belong in this world full of devotion and care
Yet I still feel like a migrant,
Oliver Twist holding out his empty bowl, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In the evening
When the sun kisses the moon goodnight
As it sinks into the darkness to rise once more
Painting the sky with pastel luminescence so breathtaking
The Gods themselves stop to take heed and
I shiver in the cold and lonely darkness I've created, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In my mind
Where I remember every good thing I've ever missed and
I try desperately to forget every wrong turn I've ever made
Wars are fought against my heart and
Casualties are made of everything and everyone I love
Yet when the trumpets sound the ceasefire, it's too late, so
I only cry when I'm alone
In the dark of night
When your eyes can still find mine but
I can't see your face
Only the wound I've made on your heart
Bruised and bleeding
Choked in the desperation of my amity until
I wish I could only cry when I'm alone
Monday, February 8, 2016
Dancing At Night
They danced in the moonlight
A seductive waltz in traditional triple time
With bodies speaking in the language of sensual seduction
And the Earth opened beneath their feet
Welcoming them to the cosmos
As they danced and danced
Into the eyes of nebulae
Through event horizons and
Past the absolute magnitude of the stars
They danced through the night
In the blackness of the sky
Over the darkness of the ocean at nighttide
With eyes connected through knowing glances
Soft secrets shared only between lovers
Partners to a dance stepped out in time
Two hearts beating as one
And in the chill of the morning
They held each other close and
Oh so tight
Fearing the love they’d found dancing in the night
Would evaporate in the harsh light of the morning
A seductive waltz in traditional triple time
With bodies speaking in the language of sensual seduction
And the Earth opened beneath their feet
Welcoming them to the cosmos
As they danced and danced
Into the eyes of nebulae
Through event horizons and
Past the absolute magnitude of the stars
They danced through the night
In the blackness of the sky
Over the darkness of the ocean at nighttide
With eyes connected through knowing glances
Soft secrets shared only between lovers
Partners to a dance stepped out in time
Two hearts beating as one
And in the chill of the morning
They held each other close and
Oh so tight
Fearing the love they’d found dancing in the night
Would evaporate in the harsh light of the morning
Friday, February 5, 2016
Redemption
Eyes as blue and clear as the sky
When I look into forever
And realize how small I am
Standing in the vastness of everything that ever was
Reaching for your hand so I can
Hold on to a love that has gone unspoken for far too long
Erasing all the broken love that came before
The result of lies, cowardice and the machinations of the petty
All gone
A hallucination of life disguised as a slow death
Lost down the rabbit hole
Replaced with you, so beautiful
Everything I ever want to be
Looking in those blue eyes now
Begging, just hold my heart, patiently
Because it’s those eyes that draw me back
Making me see I’m better than I was
Whole, happy and ready to live
The life I imagined
The only one I ever need to know
As waiting fades into now
And it’s me and you across the world
Redeemed in the eyes of the only Gods we’ve ever known:
The men behind crystal blue eyes
Looking into forever
When I look into forever
And realize how small I am
Standing in the vastness of everything that ever was
Reaching for your hand so I can
Hold on to a love that has gone unspoken for far too long
Erasing all the broken love that came before
The result of lies, cowardice and the machinations of the petty
All gone
A hallucination of life disguised as a slow death
Lost down the rabbit hole
Replaced with you, so beautiful
Everything I ever want to be
Looking in those blue eyes now
Begging, just hold my heart, patiently
Because it’s those eyes that draw me back
Making me see I’m better than I was
Whole, happy and ready to live
The life I imagined
The only one I ever need to know
As waiting fades into now
And it’s me and you across the world
Redeemed in the eyes of the only Gods we’ve ever known:
The men behind crystal blue eyes
Looking into forever
Thursday, November 5, 2015
I Can't Save You
I can create anything I want and make it as reall as I want. I can tell any story; dramatic, or scary or funny as I choose to weave it. But I can't save you.
All the rage inside you ... the all consuming fire that twists us and turns us around, making us into the monstrous beasts that we ourselves don't understand.
I can understand it. I can understand you. I can see everything I've already seen and everything I want to unsee through your eyes. I can feel the chaos inside and I can hear the cocophany. but I can't silence it.
See, I made you. As completely and perfectly in my image as God made Adam. It's just that I didn't understand that the apple of my eye was original sin to poison your innocence and banish you from paradise.
All the rage inside you ... the all consuming fire that twists us and turns us around, making us into the monstrous beasts that we ourselves don't understand.
I can understand it. I can understand you. I can see everything I've already seen and everything I want to unsee through your eyes. I can feel the chaos inside and I can hear the cocophany. but I can't silence it.
See, I made you. As completely and perfectly in my image as God made Adam. It's just that I didn't understand that the apple of my eye was original sin to poison your innocence and banish you from paradise.
Thursday, October 1, 2015
The Anatomy of a Mix Tape
I cover my ears so I can drown
In the thoughts of you that are so deafening
Giving in to an even louder silence
Created by your absence
And its like I can't breathe
So consumed am I by these thoughts of you
Being with you
Kissing you
Loving you
Until I don't know who I am anymore
Then the music plays
With every song a carefully chosen communication
A message sent in a code
Only you and I will understand
The first song must absolutely grab your attention
You have to know how much I want you
Perhaps U2's Desire
To show much I need you
Maybe VAST's Touched
Because I'll never find someone like you again
Or one after the other
A sonic 1-2 punch of yearning to slap you in the face
And then something to dull this intensity
The Devlins' Love is Blindness
To float in the ether enjoying the wonderment that is you
Next a track to show my vulnerability
Because I'm safe with you
A Quiet Mind from Blue October should go here
And while we're being emotional
Concrete Blonde's I Call It Love
A musical curve ball, sort of like love itself
Now The Subways' Oh Yeah
Because It's your eyes that make me smile
Oh yeah.
Now to start the wind down
Kingdom Come from Coldplay
Just say you'll wait for me
Debris when we revisit Blue October
And things get crazy in that good way
Another from Concrete Blonde to tell you that
(Love is a) Blind Ambition
With a finish of U2's All I Want is You
With the music gone
I can once again hear the thoughts of you
Only now it's anticipation
Written as a playlist punctuated with hearts and Cupid's arrows
Wrapped in red ribbon
Sealed with a kiss
Delivered to you as a tribute
To the night I spent lost in thoughts of you
Drowned in a sea of the idea of you
With the knowledge that as you listen
Each note will flow into you
Like I want to
Connecting us across time and space
When you spend your night lost in thoughts of me
In the thoughts of you that are so deafening
Giving in to an even louder silence
Created by your absence
And its like I can't breathe
So consumed am I by these thoughts of you
Being with you
Kissing you
Loving you
Until I don't know who I am anymore
Then the music plays
With every song a carefully chosen communication
A message sent in a code
Only you and I will understand
The first song must absolutely grab your attention
You have to know how much I want you
Perhaps U2's Desire
To show much I need you
Maybe VAST's Touched
Because I'll never find someone like you again
Or one after the other
A sonic 1-2 punch of yearning to slap you in the face
And then something to dull this intensity
The Devlins' Love is Blindness
To float in the ether enjoying the wonderment that is you
Next a track to show my vulnerability
Because I'm safe with you
A Quiet Mind from Blue October should go here
And while we're being emotional
Concrete Blonde's I Call It Love
A musical curve ball, sort of like love itself
Now The Subways' Oh Yeah
Because It's your eyes that make me smile
Oh yeah.
Now to start the wind down
Kingdom Come from Coldplay
Just say you'll wait for me
Debris when we revisit Blue October
And things get crazy in that good way
Another from Concrete Blonde to tell you that
(Love is a) Blind Ambition
With a finish of U2's All I Want is You
With the music gone
I can once again hear the thoughts of you
Only now it's anticipation
Written as a playlist punctuated with hearts and Cupid's arrows
Wrapped in red ribbon
Sealed with a kiss
Delivered to you as a tribute
To the night I spent lost in thoughts of you
Drowned in a sea of the idea of you
With the knowledge that as you listen
Each note will flow into you
Like I want to
Connecting us across time and space
When you spend your night lost in thoughts of me
Thursday, September 10, 2015
One Night Stand
The way you kiss me fiercely
As if my lips held the cure for your sadness
The way your hand deftly unzipped my pants
Searching for masculinity to match your own
The way you pushed me to my knees
Gently asserting your will
And I return your kiss
Drinking the poison you've carried for so long
And I filled your hand with everything you desired
Man to man, burning in passionate fire
And I drop to my knees
Paying you the tribute you deserve
We both know you're going to fuck me
As I rise to my feet looking in your eyes
Telling me without words
That I'm wearing too many clothes
Buttons hit the wall, ripped open with my shirt
While we slowly dance to the bed
I'm on my knees
A supplicant to your desire
The familiar pleasure pain reminding me
I am the object of your lust
As you fuck me, fuck me
FUCK ME
Your essence floods me
Filling me with all you are
The very best of you
Deep inside me
Filling me, changing me
Taking the very best of me, returned to you as a gift.
The way you hold me
As if all the joy in the world just passed between our bodies
The way you lightly stroke my ass
Reaffirming the intimacy born of our lust
The way you sent me on my way
Sated, satisfied and solitary
As if my lips held the cure for your sadness
The way your hand deftly unzipped my pants
Searching for masculinity to match your own
The way you pushed me to my knees
Gently asserting your will
And I return your kiss
Drinking the poison you've carried for so long
And I filled your hand with everything you desired
Man to man, burning in passionate fire
And I drop to my knees
Paying you the tribute you deserve
We both know you're going to fuck me
As I rise to my feet looking in your eyes
Telling me without words
That I'm wearing too many clothes
Buttons hit the wall, ripped open with my shirt
While we slowly dance to the bed
I'm on my knees
A supplicant to your desire
The familiar pleasure pain reminding me
I am the object of your lust
As you fuck me, fuck me
FUCK ME
Your essence floods me
Filling me with all you are
The very best of you
Deep inside me
Filling me, changing me
Taking the very best of me, returned to you as a gift.
The way you hold me
As if all the joy in the world just passed between our bodies
The way you lightly stroke my ass
Reaffirming the intimacy born of our lust
The way you sent me on my way
Sated, satisfied and solitary
Thursday, August 27, 2015
Crossroads
North is the land of memory.
All mistakes and stupidity.
The bright fantasies of inexperienced youth.
That time when your cock leads you around by your balls
and Sex, drugs and rock 'n roll are the law of the land.
Oh what a time we had!
South is the land of responsibility.
Everyone does exactly what they're supposed to
And live revolves around tiny boxes.
Tiny boxes to live in.
Tiny boxes to stare at.
Numb and believing they exist outside their tiny boxes.
To the East is the village of family.
Watch how they hide from each other,
Even while embracing affectionately.
Where the promise of 'happily ever after' hangs in the air
Like a carrot before a mule.
Everything anyone could need; just out of reach.
Westward the sun sets,
Its bright rays stabbing the eyes
A reminder that even in beauty there is pain.
A place where living as one was meant to be
Permeates the air with the discovery of the unknown
Explored by those who understand the limitless potential of the mind
So here I stand at the crossroads
Looking back at every trodden path
I wonder how it's possible that every turn was wrong?
The answer to this question refuses to show itself
It's so busy contemplating it's own self-righteousness
That nothing else matters
Have you ever rebuilt yourself from the ground up?
Splintering the past that shaped you
Into the dagger plunged into your own chest
All the while knowing that this moment is the moment
The one you've been rushing toward your whole life
With no way to stop it?
The right words always come too late
So I learned to cry in six languages
Just to make sure that every time I opened my eyes
I could see raindrops on the window of the world
A beautiful storm.
Perfect soliloquy.
I thought I was looking for death
But it turns out I was looking for love.
All mistakes and stupidity.
The bright fantasies of inexperienced youth.
That time when your cock leads you around by your balls
and Sex, drugs and rock 'n roll are the law of the land.
Oh what a time we had!
South is the land of responsibility.
Everyone does exactly what they're supposed to
And live revolves around tiny boxes.
Tiny boxes to live in.
Tiny boxes to stare at.
Numb and believing they exist outside their tiny boxes.
To the East is the village of family.
Watch how they hide from each other,
Even while embracing affectionately.
Where the promise of 'happily ever after' hangs in the air
Like a carrot before a mule.
Everything anyone could need; just out of reach.
Westward the sun sets,
Its bright rays stabbing the eyes
A reminder that even in beauty there is pain.
A place where living as one was meant to be
Permeates the air with the discovery of the unknown
Explored by those who understand the limitless potential of the mind
So here I stand at the crossroads
Looking back at every trodden path
I wonder how it's possible that every turn was wrong?
The answer to this question refuses to show itself
It's so busy contemplating it's own self-righteousness
That nothing else matters
Have you ever rebuilt yourself from the ground up?
Splintering the past that shaped you
Into the dagger plunged into your own chest
All the while knowing that this moment is the moment
The one you've been rushing toward your whole life
With no way to stop it?
The right words always come too late
So I learned to cry in six languages
Just to make sure that every time I opened my eyes
I could see raindrops on the window of the world
A beautiful storm.
Perfect soliloquy.
I thought I was looking for death
But it turns out I was looking for love.
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Schedule
It's a new week. A Sunday, a new beginning. A day to wake up with the sun, stretch my arms and rip the curtains off the wall with eagerness to face this day! You lay next to me, chest rising and falling in a peaceful sleep. And in that moment its easy to forget that even in paradise, the sun sets.
Monday comes with the shock of the alarms ringing in my head. Responsibility crashes around me and I open my eyes, still tired and trying to do the math of how many hours, minutes and seconds until I can sleep again. Until the world fades again and the hurting stops and I can float away into the ether of a blessedly dreamless void.
Tuesday breaks through; a smack to the face with none of the comfort of an accompanying splash of water. Another day, another dollar; as the saying goes. But I'm already running on fumes and there's nothing you can buy for a dollar these days. Not even a 20 minute phone call, much less the motivation to rise above the muck where I swim with the other "dregs." Oh darling, I wish you were here.
Wednesday and I'm halfway out of the dark. I'm already thinking about you and I have to believe that what I'm thinking is the reason that it's called "Hump" day. I can't focus on anything but the memory of when you'd bend me at the waist, pull me back slowly, fuck me hard and whisper softly into my neck that I'm yours. I want to give you the air I breathe and I'm caught up in the pleasure of the pain, because even if it's moving too fast, baby, we should take it too far.
Thursday I dreamed that we were together and you wanted me as much as I want you. I held you in my arms and made you safe. You thanked me with a kiss and as the fireworks burst behind my eyes I thought to myself, "why does my tongue feel so damn safe inside of your mouth?" And I fall again.
Friday I sat under the stars thinking about you and wondering if maybe, just maybe you were thinking about me too. Only to see the answer in the light of the moon. You're like perfection, some kind of holiday, you got me thinking that we could run away. Into your vision of the future, through the looking glass you held in front of our faces. The shimmering reflection of what we could be.
Saturday I woke up wanting to kiss you. I crave your touch making me feel like I'm being electrocuted. I crave your lust-filled eyes fixed on me as the only being worth conquering in this universe. I want to taste you again, like a secret or a sin. I think about pressing my lips against yours; fusing our bodies together. Each of us desperately searching for something the other doesn't know is inside them. Thousands of years old, too old to be captured in poems. Too old to be loved by everyone; but loved deeply by a chosen few.
It's a new week. A Sunday, a new beginning. You lay next to me, chest rising and falling in a peaceful sleep. Looking at you, I realize, you're the perfect example of falling for someone's soul before their skin. Because as beautiful as you are through all the days; I didn't truly love you until I'd memorized the sound of your laugh and swam in the blue of your eyes.
Monday comes with the shock of the alarms ringing in my head. Responsibility crashes around me and I open my eyes, still tired and trying to do the math of how many hours, minutes and seconds until I can sleep again. Until the world fades again and the hurting stops and I can float away into the ether of a blessedly dreamless void.
Tuesday breaks through; a smack to the face with none of the comfort of an accompanying splash of water. Another day, another dollar; as the saying goes. But I'm already running on fumes and there's nothing you can buy for a dollar these days. Not even a 20 minute phone call, much less the motivation to rise above the muck where I swim with the other "dregs." Oh darling, I wish you were here.
Wednesday and I'm halfway out of the dark. I'm already thinking about you and I have to believe that what I'm thinking is the reason that it's called "Hump" day. I can't focus on anything but the memory of when you'd bend me at the waist, pull me back slowly, fuck me hard and whisper softly into my neck that I'm yours. I want to give you the air I breathe and I'm caught up in the pleasure of the pain, because even if it's moving too fast, baby, we should take it too far.
Thursday I dreamed that we were together and you wanted me as much as I want you. I held you in my arms and made you safe. You thanked me with a kiss and as the fireworks burst behind my eyes I thought to myself, "why does my tongue feel so damn safe inside of your mouth?" And I fall again.
Friday I sat under the stars thinking about you and wondering if maybe, just maybe you were thinking about me too. Only to see the answer in the light of the moon. You're like perfection, some kind of holiday, you got me thinking that we could run away. Into your vision of the future, through the looking glass you held in front of our faces. The shimmering reflection of what we could be.
Saturday I woke up wanting to kiss you. I crave your touch making me feel like I'm being electrocuted. I crave your lust-filled eyes fixed on me as the only being worth conquering in this universe. I want to taste you again, like a secret or a sin. I think about pressing my lips against yours; fusing our bodies together. Each of us desperately searching for something the other doesn't know is inside them. Thousands of years old, too old to be captured in poems. Too old to be loved by everyone; but loved deeply by a chosen few.
It's a new week. A Sunday, a new beginning. You lay next to me, chest rising and falling in a peaceful sleep. Looking at you, I realize, you're the perfect example of falling for someone's soul before their skin. Because as beautiful as you are through all the days; I didn't truly love you until I'd memorized the sound of your laugh and swam in the blue of your eyes.
Meditation of the Bull
All I see is red
Gouts of blood on tips of horns
You're beautiful
The sun on my skin
Like being wrapped up in safe love
It feels like heaven
All I see is red
Gouts of blood on tips of horns
You're beautiful
Gouts of blood on tips of horns
You're beautiful
The sun on my skin
Like being wrapped up in safe love
It feels like heaven
All I see is red
Gouts of blood on tips of horns
You're beautiful
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